Telling A Good Story

To all of us who, as children, built thousands of forts, went on countless adventures down the Amazon, explored the wilds of the Yukon... Caines Arcade rules.

To all of us who want to tell stories about the power of a child's imagination, or how strong is our inner drive to create something concrete from the ideas swimming around our heads... Nirvan Mullick shows us how to do so with mastery.

The best part though, or maybe it is just the cherry on top, is the song at the end. Can you imagine having a song written about you?

Doing Small Things Well

The wonders of doing something well. Whether it is a freshly ironed shirt,



Or making a good cup of cappuccino,



It is delight seeing these two people doing something with elegance and care. Don't you think?

As Time Passes Quietly

Dear Sister, Dear Friend, and to
Those of Us who remember... days
Of hopeful anticipation, butterflies,
That prickling sensation, those
Moments before flight, when there
Was air under my feet, oh the joy,
Oh the lightness of breath… stepping
Forward into an adventure. Knowing
I'd never really know, but still...
Leaping, prancing, twirling with
Abandon, because life was spring
All was new and my spirit was free.

Now my dreams are muffled in
Coats of daily challenges, whether
Fair or not, it does not matter,
Really, truly, they do not define my
Self. Time slowly, quietly dances
Amongst the leaves of such splendor,
Such sublime lightness. The falling.
Who would have known? Certainly not
Me of the past. Thank God for that.

Anniversary Overlooked

I just realised that I forgot my sixth-year blogging anniversary. My heavens, how could that happen! Many marriages don't last that long.

And, yes, the first flush is long over. The "is this all" hit the wall, was rather messy, but I managed (hopefully) to clean it up without anyone noticing (thank you Charlotte and Kristi for your help on this occasion).

It almost makes me teary to think of all the ups-and-downs that I experienced over these six years. Would I start a blog today knowing what I know now?... to be honest, probably not. Would I want to miss out on blogging, no matter how sporadically it has become?... definitely not!

Directly connected to all approximately 1,200 blog entries are the nearly 250 collages I have made. It boggles my mind... here are a good slice of my favourite collages. (I know, you've seen them all, but I thought it would be appropriate to post the slideshow once again.)



I have met great people through my blogging, have developed deep and meaningful friendships, discovered brilliant ideas on other blogs, explored a lot of my inner landscape, and probably left behind the most important document in my life for my children to explore at their risk some time in the future.

Long live the internet!

New World

Many many years ago, I wrote three scripts for computer games for women. It was an idea before its time...the games blended video sequences, digital storylines, and mini-games into a gaming experience that was quirky and entertaining.

In order to try and find a game publisher, I attended a few game shows. And, while I was there I did manage to speak to people (men) involved in the business. They kindly introduced me to the ins-and-outs of the publishing business.

The gaming business is huge and exciting and a massive sub-culture many people never "get". Yet those who know their way around in this world have great stories to tell.

P.S. The scripts are still in their numerous binders in a storage cupboard. I got as far as having a few meetings with production managers of Sony Europe. Their final thought, "interesting, but too expensive to produce". One of these days I'll take the scripts out again and brush off the dust and see whether there is anything worth salvaging.

Homage to my Umbrella I

Summer is here and the only thing I can say is, "Are you kidding?" I'm not going to talk about the weather, no matter how strange and horrible it might be. Instead, I've decided to do a series of "Homage to my Umbrella" collages, with little or no comment.

Long ago, there was a time when I loved nothing better than going for walks during storms. Ah, my early 20s, when primal fears and melancholic indulgences ran amok. Fortunately, I had some chums who would accompany me on these excursions. Snow, sleet, fog, torrential rains... all good elements to batter down my moodiness.

Looking back on those days, I imagine the me-then calling up today and asking the me-now to go out for a walk and the only thing that comes to mind is, "Are you kidding?"

Cherry Blossom Petals

photo from topmedic

Young boy loses himself playing in a sandbox populated with last year's toys and carpeted with this year's cherry blossom petals.

It's been a while

It's been a while since I've posted a TED talk. Figuring that you guys have probably caught on to the idea of how awesome some of the talks are. And, there have been numerous occasions when I've been tempted and not given into the temptation.

Today, a beautiful sunny day, a day before a long Easter weekend, I want to post one more TED talk:



For Kathryn Schulz is so right about being wrong, so clever and unassuming at the same time. She brings joy to my heart.

Science mapping a Personal Journey

Dan Ariely is a behaviour economist. Aren’t you intrigues to hear that there is a profession called behaviour economics?

Two years ago, I watched Ariely speak about the results of scientific studies explaining why human beings are predictably irrational. It was a fascinating speech, not only because of the findings, but because he is so convincingly and passionately invested in discovering the ways “emotional states, moral codes and peer pressure affect our ability to make rational and often extremely important decisions in our daily lives”.

This morning I had the acute pleasure in watching Ariely’s PopTech 2011 talk, Adaptive Responses.



It is a rare person who can convincing map science as a personal journey of discovery. Ariely tell a touching story connecting scientific findings with personal existential angst and the yearning for love. He does this with such courage, humour, intrepidness, I could only watch in awe.

What is particularly fascinating is to see what a fine line he walks between telling very intimate details of his life without exposing the identity or opinions of any of his family or friends. Secondly, the details he mentions of himself are presented in such a way that lend his intellectual arguments weight without becoming a burden to the audience.

Immeasurable help from friends

The Opening of my art exhibit "Art for Positive Social Change" is next Tuesday on the 100th Anniversary of the International Women's Day. 

So yesterday, two friends agreed to help put up the collages. M. is a terrific handyman. L. is an artist with a lot of experience in setting up exhibits. If I am really honest, I initially asked them to come along for the company.
I thought that I would arrive at the venue with the old exhibit gone, some strips of nylon and hooks hanging down the walls. In my mind, all that we needed to do was to take the collages hang them up on the hooks, and presto, an hour later... all would be done. This could not have been further from the reality.

Old art exhibit still up. Hanging wires soldered to the paintings. No extra wires or hooks in sight. No help from the people working there. No tools beyond my nifty measuring tape. I was seriously ill-prepared. Except, EXCEPT, by some fluke I'd asked M. and L. to come along for the ride.

Between the two of them, all was up in three hours. Not only that, it looks good.

To those of you who in a moment of craziness decide to undertake some public enterprise, be forewarned, you need to bring in an expert! L. helped decide which of the pictures should hang where, how to hang them, and also went running off home to pick up the hooks and wiring system we needed. I stood around trying to be as helpful and experiencing one hot flash after another.

Oh, what would we do if it wasn't for friends!

Dudley Dursley Double

Sighted this afternoon, a Dudley double at the table across from us at a local restaurant. The same pug nose, body shape, rounded cheeks, greedy eyes, and sloppy table manners... I was tempted to look and see if he had a pig's tale.

The question is, is whether the Dudleys of this world become ugly through by being spoilt and over indulged by their parents, or did they become greedy and mean on their own?

Swan Lake

I just bought tickets to see Swan Lake with my daughter over the holiday season. It is one of my favourite classical ballets: both for its choreography and music. In one of my past lives, it was also one of the ballets I learnt to dance. That is such a long time ago, it is hard to remember or even believe in.



What I do remember was the experience of going to watch Swan Lake with an ex-ballet friend in Munich some 20 years ago (long after we had both had left the ballet profession). It was a stunning performance. I remember the pure unfettered pleasure watching the ballet brought to my heart. This was something I hadn’t experience during the years while I danced.

Gone was the critical scalpel vision every dancer posses while observing other dancers. Something that cuts each dancer’s movements into feet, extensions, pointe work, and arms; each solo into the number of pirouettes turned and heights leapt; and pas de deuxs into lifts mastered. Instead, I sat mesmerised by the graceful movement and was deeply moved by the music.

I was not feeling nostalgic for those past times, but rather the experience of watching the ballet was enhanced by the familiarity of a personal shared history. This made me wonder whether this is what happens in life in general. Do we, as we grow older, receive pleasure by watching others dance the dance of life’s ups-and-downs in a way we could not when we were younger?

Overheard Converstation of an Idiot

In stressful situations, not all people can remain cool and calm. Renovating a home: laying tiles, putting up wallpaper, painting window- and door-frames, though not rocket science, can put a strain on any marriage.



Yesterday, I passed a home in our neighbourhood (similar to the house above) where a couple have been working feverishly to renovate their new old home. They been at it since the beginning of the month and seem to be doing all the work themselves.

As I walked by their open front door, where the husband was laying down tiles in the entrance area, his wife came up to him with a cup of coffee she had just pored out of their themos. She was covered head-to-toe in a dusty overalls and paint was sprinkled all over her head. (Yeah, guess who got the job of painting all the ceilings.) As she was handing over the cup to her husband, she tripped and a slurp of coffee fell on his newly lain tiles.

The spontaneous poisonous barrage that came out of her husband was startling. After being rendered speechless, the wife apologized profusely. To which the husband responded, "Being sorry won't stop a plane from crashing." Talk about over-reacting. Talk about being an idiot.


All of this happened in the time it took me to walk by their front door. I know the incident is just a micro-moment in a relationship, but I did wonder if the couple will manage to move into their new place. And if they do,  how long will they stay together.

Helping Women and Youths

Over the years I've been following the work of various social enterpreuers and activists. There are quite a few people, but I suppose the 3-4 people who have most directly changed my thinking on what to do and how to do things to help change the future in a positive and constructive mannter,are Nathan Eagle, Ory Okolloh, Ethan Zuckerman, and Jacqueline Novogratz.

Jacqueline Novogratz is the CEO of the Acumen Foundation and she and the foundation efforts to promot "patient capital" is highlightedin CNBC World in their program “What the Future” (part 1, part 2, part 3). Please give it a watch. In the first part of the program, the post election escalation of violence is portrayed.

It was during this time that the 250 children and gaurdians of the NGO that I work with, Community Breakthrough Support Mission (CBSM), had to be evacuated out of Nairobi and transported to Kimilili, Kenya. In the last two years, Rev. Wasike and the elders of the CBSM have tried very hard to help the women and youths to build a strong community.

Those of us working with the CBSM often get asked why we are focusing so much of our efforts on helping women co-ops and youth groups to build successful small-scale businesses. Recently, Rev. Wasike wrote the following about our work in general and empowering women and youth specifically. I'd like to share with you his thoughts on the matter for the eloquently argue the matter:

The essence of all of our work is to make the community a self-reliant and independent collective. This compels us to initiate programs that may be realised by the women in the local community. Women in Kimilili and the surrounding area have not been allowed to partake in running business es because their husbands do not approve. They believe women should stay culturally apart where they can bring up their children in the homes; irrespective of whether there is food available or whether their children are attending school or not. Traditionally, women have been competing in the number of children they give birth to as a form of status since polygamy is still practiced.

For as long as I can remember, youth 's work in our community was to take care of the livestock. Tragically, this livestock no longer exist in large scale as used to be, hence make this group is left idle and hence a source of violence and crime in the community.

My understanding is that what a child needs most today in order to be self reliant tomorrow is food and a good education to unlock potential of the child. A child also needs shelter for security and health when sick.

Most men in Kenya, and this is culturally approved , believe it is okay for them to inclusively use any income increase they earn to increase the number of wives. The bigger their families are, the more respect they earn in the community. This is unlike women, whose first priority is the wellbeing of their family (parents and children.

I believe that by empowering women and youth in the community, we are doing something similar to doing an overhaul on an engine that we can always count on for the rest of our long journey. Thankfully, it is becoming more common to see women running business than it was previously. Yet, without proper knowledge on how they can best do business and without the proper capital their journey is arduous.

Hence if a chance arises for us to empower one woman who has 10 children, what we are doing in creating this opportunity is taking care of the 10 children. In fact, starting the women empowering program has already created real help. For instance, during the last school term almost all the vegetables the school cooked for the children came for free from the women co-ops we trained in our first two CBSM Gardening Vocational Training Program workshops. During the workshops, we taught them best business practices and gave them water pumps and seeds.

This term we have avoided the cost of cooks, as four women who had applied to be enlisted for workshops and our facility was not able to accommodate them, offered to do the cooking at CBSM school for free for children this term . They did this on the condition that they would be able to attand the next series of workshops. They have done wonderful work this term, reduced the cost of running the school as salary for cooks is recurring cost and recurring costs are very painful always come when one one is not ready. Fortunately, we are happy to be giving our next workshops in August, which they will be able to attend.

It is our believe that through collective will and work we will offer our children a safe and happy environment to grow in.

Amen
Rev. Wasike

Loving my Kids

I love me kids. Not in a small way, but in a way that often takes my breath away. Especially on mornings like this morning, when there is anticipation in the air.

The last days have been consumed with making check lists and buying travel items for my daughter. She is getting ready to take off on an adventure tomorrow with her best friend. They are flying to Grenada to visit my mother and friends. Just knowing how smart and self-assured she is, helps me get over my nervousness about her flying the coop.

Then there is my son, who is quietly getting ready to fly to southern Italy to visit his other family. He doesn't talk much, nor does he make many demands, but he makes his presence felt by sending me messages in form of links on my google reader. Today's favourite is,

Don't make decisions when you are angry.
Don't make promises when you are happy.

I have been known to do both. Particularly the later. It is wonderful to read some piece of advice that doesn't need explanation. Blatant truths. We need them sometimes.

Elder as an Expert

This large poster now hangs on a building across the way from where we live. It is an advertising campaign to encourage cross-generational relationships.

The slogan is in the form of a short newspaper partnership ad:

Expert on love relationships seeks someone to do chores.

My translation does not really do justice to the beauty of the slogan. The slogan communicates well how building social interaction between elders and younger people can be a mutually profitable relationship.

Their site (in German) is explained as such,

"Elders are experts about life/living. They have experienced much and have survived much. In this Caritis blog, 52 authours write about various sides of life as an elder."

Dinner-for-One

Dinner-for-One sits quietly at a corner table during the After-Work-Party. Her red wine a subtle, or is that conservative, contrast to the Two-for-One cocktails marching by, adorned with cut fruit, glitzy umbrellas, and soldiering stripped straws.

A bit shocking

A colleague told the following story during the break today:

Recently, I went with my young granddaughter (four years old) shopping. We went and bought some clothes for her at a department store and then went and bought some clothes for me. She and I went into a crowded changing room so that I could try on some clothes. She saw me nude and said very loudly, "Granny, how come you have hair down there?" I responded, "Women always have hair there" Which she vehemently responded, "Mommy, doesn't!" A silence descended upon the changing area, and then there were a few chuckles and snickers to be heard.

Compassion

While thinking upon our actions of this past year and the goals we wish to set for the year to come, perhaps the words of the Charter for Compassion can move us towards peaceful action.



Last year, Karen Armstrong spoke to the TED community about her wish to make religion a force for harmony by creating with others the Charter for Compassion. She speaks well about how we are currently being summoned towards compassionate action; how we have to move away from toleration and towards appreciation of others.

Ghost from the Past

About 18 years ago, I became acquainted with a woman who had been laid off from the company I worked at. This short acquaintanceship taught me a painful lesson about naivety and ignorance.

After having met with her a few times, I hired her to come and clean my apartment once a week. She was very thankful for this additional source of income and all went well for a few months. After a while I began to miss a few items. Since I am a very forgetful type of person, I didn't think anything of it. It was only after she suddenly stopped coming to clean (having given the most weak of excuses) that I began to make the connection of missing items to times she came to clean.

A horrible moment of realisation about how stupidly naive I had been, came when I went into my cupboard and took down my jewelry box. It should have contained all the jewelery I received as a child in Venezuela and the pieces I had inherited from my grandmother. I found it empty.

I haven't thought of the lost jewelry in many years, until yesterday when the woman came into the Oxfam shop when I was working there. She didn't recognise me. It has been nearly twenty years after all. I'm probably only one of many people she stole from in her life. Yet, I recognized her for she's the only one whose stolen from me.

It would be nice to say that I felt forgiveness towards her, but I didn't. Instead, I just felt this leaden dullness in my heart. The whole episode was like a visit of a ghost from the past.