The Shawn Of My Childhood (Part Three)

Shawn tells me that being an alter boy is quite a cushy job and has certain privileges. You get first dibs on communion. You get to miss school for funerals.

He shows me the cupboard where all the priest robes are stored. There are different coloured robes for religious holidays like Easter and Christmas. Shawn tells me there is a special store downtown that only has robes for priests, nuns, and alter boys.

He points out the vault where the consecrated hosts are stored. He explains that the priest consecrates the hosts during mass and so, if there are hosts left over, they have to be stored for the next mass or eaten. It is a sin to throw away consecrated hosts. It would be like throwing away the body of Christ. I don’t know if I should believe him.

I ask him how long he has been an alter boy and he admits he only started about six months ago. But, he says he knows a lot about it because all of his six brothers were alter boys before him.

I ask him why he falls asleep during mass. He blushes from the top of his head to the bottom of his toes. It’s because he is hungry. His mother doesn’t allow any of the family to eat before mass. I start feeling sorry for Shawn.

It must be fun to miss school though… Shawn admits he doesn’t like doing funerals if they are open coffin funerals. He spends all of his time trying not to stare at the dead person.

Then I remember how, at my grandfather’s funeral, Shawn had looked down at the ground the whole time. Father Eugene circled around my grandfather coffin, sweeping the incense burner back and forth, back and forth. Sending waves of smoke across my grandfather’s face. Shawn followed behind looking at the priest’s feet. Father Eugene then handed Shawn the burner to hold while he genuflected and prayed for my grandfather’s spirit.

There was so much smoke coming out of the incense burner, Shawn was choking. He decided to place his alter boy’s robe over the burner. The smoke stoped instantly. He let out a sigh of relief. But then, the smoke started coming up from the inside of his collar.

When I saw the smoke slowly crawling up his neck, I started to laugh. I put my head down in prayer, but my body shook up and down. Fortunately, my parents thought I was crying, so I didn’t get into trouble.

Shawn was not so fortunate. He told me that Father Eugene really yelled at him and then called his mother about the incident. When Shawn got home, his mother also yelled at him. His brothers teased him. His father ignored him.

Somehow I sort of feel responsible for getting him into trouble. It was my grandfather’s funeral. Maybe I just feel bad because I laughed at him.

So, as we walk back to the catechism class, I ask Shawn whether I could have a piece of his bubble gum after all. He fishes out the package from his back pocket and proudly hands me a piece. The gum is rather old looking and just a little bit sticky, but I put it in my mouth and tell him it tastes good.

He whole face lights up in a smile. I realise then that even though the gum comes at a price, I am willing to pay it. That day during recess, I stand beside Shawn in the playground and we watch the older kids playing dodge ball. This is the first of many recesses, though thankfully, we never held hands.

Note: This story is loosely based on fact. All except for incident with the incense burner, which really happened.