A fairy landscape

From my train window
Silver shimmers in the woods
Ice-tipped tree branches.

Explore: time-boxing

One of the first areas of exploration I’m diving into is time-boxing. This is a self-management tool I have used in the past, but I never really liked it unless I was scheduling time off from raising kids or doing my job. Something like an hour to DYOB (do your own business) or a Saturday “say no to everyone but yourself”.
 
Recently, I was inspired by Nir Eyal’s ideas from his interview with Ali Abdaal, "How to Stay Focused and Beat Distraction". So, I've decided to experiment with this method for the next 3-4 months. I aim to live according to my calendar and time-box my work in areas I hold dear.
 
Eyal doesn’t like to-do lists, which I've also tried and dropped many times over the years. He advocates for time-boxing as a way to truly align our time with our intentions. The way Eyal talks about it, the advantage of time-boxing is that it isn’t about finishing every task—because life’s unpredictable, and it is really hard to know how long a task will take. Also, what does "finish" mean when it comes to writing or creative work? 

He highlights the difference between time-boxing reflective work (which requires focus) and reactive work (which needs to get done quickly and painlessly). Asking oneself: Did I focus my attention on the activities I intended to do? Was I able to do them without distractions?
 
To make admin work more enjoyable, I’m adopting the idea suggested by Ali Abdaal (the interviewer in the video) of doing a regular Admin Party. I’ll allocate specific time for this type of work (e.g. answering emails, banking, and scheduling doctor’s appointments) and try to make it fun. For example, when I’m at a café or the library—where I enjoy some level of distraction—I’ll dedicate that time to administrative tasks. Adding constraints and some variability can keep things engaging while helping me stay on track.

On the other hand, for artistic and reflective work, I want to take a different approach when setting up my weekly schedule. I’ll ask myself, “Knowing the limited time I have, how would the person I want to become in the future spend their time?”

#booksIlove: The Golden Compass trilogy

Title: The Golden Compass, Dark Materials, by Philip Pullman
When did I first read the book: soon after it came out in 1995
 
This trilogy was one of Claudia's finds. Right from the first book, Pullman created a whole new world with such eery precision.
 
I nearly always "read" the series as audiobooks because the experience is like watching a movie with your eyes closed, but my sense of imagination turned on full volume. The voices, the music, and the pace of the reading are magnificent. It's no wonder the quality is so fantastic; Philip Pullman, Joanna Wyatt and 10 more actors are lending their voices to the production.
 
The books are brilliant… the audiobooks are brilliant to the power of two.

Back on the cushion

So excited. I’m back in the “heart prayer” meditation program at the Wennigsen monastery near Hannover. The 850-year-old monastery transports you back through the countless lives of those who sought contemplation and reflection. The group of participants bring kindness and joyful energy into the room. The program leaders have years of wisdom and experience guiding us along our spiritual journeys.

Looking back on 2024: a year of change

You know how we all say we'll do a year-end reflection, but it usually gets pushed back? Well, this time, I actually got it done quickly - just an hour!
 
Taking time to reflect feels like catching up with an old friend - it helps me appreciate all the big moments, tough spots, and growth along the way. Here's what made 2024 special:
 
The Big Stuff
 
Retiring was huge! It happened so fast - I was running global workshops right until the end, barely having any time to say proper goodbyes. But wow, the moment I stepped away? There was such a sense of freedom. It felt like putting down a backpack I didn't even know I was carrying. Now can explore my creative side without constraints.
 
One of my proudest developments was getting my confidence back with Talkshow Rivals. The project had me doubting myself for a while, but working with amazing people like Amol, Sara, Sarah, and Craig helped me believe in it again.
 
And speaking of Sara - watching her start a job at the German Space Agency was absolutely incredible. Though I can't take any credit, seeing her step into space security just fills me with joy.
 
Dreams for 2025

1. Finally getting Talkshow Rivals from my head to the screen - selling the script would be amazing
2. Doing steady and interesting work as a content developer and ghostwriter
3. Going on an incredible sea voyage (best retirement gift ever!) from Australia to Singapore on a bulk carrier
4. Publishing my Tornado Anna children's book with Josi's beautiful illustrations

Looking back, 2024 was all about transitions - letting go of the familiar and embracing new adventures. 

Frozen composition

White cat at window 

Yellow and puce walls, blue skies 
My heart, filled with joy.

This year’s theme: explore

This year’s theme is going to be “Explore”. This theme feels expansive and full of possibility—an invitation to venture beyond the familiar and discover new horizons.
 
Exploration can take many forms. It might mean travelling to a place I’ve never been, learning a new skill I’ve always wanted to learn, or delving into ideas and cultures that challenge my perspectives. It’s about curiosity, growth, and the courage to step outside of my comfort zone.
 
For me, exploration is as much about the inner journey as it is about the outer one. What will I learn about myself through these experiences? How will I grow and change? These are the questions I’ll be carrying with me throughout the year.

Adieu to this year's theme

Every year, I focus on a theme. This year's was "Who am I?"—a question that proved both simple and profound. This journey is in no way complete, yet it is satisfying to have wandered down these paths of reflection and self-discovery. The theme encouraged me to explore questions about identity, purpose, and growth—questions that often linger in the background of my thoughts.

Looking back, I realize how much this theme shaped not just my blog posts but also my daily life. It's been a year of journaling, quiet mornings with a cup of tea and contemplation. I found myself pausing more often, noticing the small moments that make up who I am: the way I light up when talking about my creative projects with others, how I unconsciously smile when I see the interaction of people sitting in a café, or my tendency to collect interesting conversations like others collect stamps. 

While the journey to answering "Who am I?" is ongoing (and perhaps never-ending), I'm grateful for the clarity and connection it has brought. It's helped me understand that identity isn't a destination but a series of small discoveries, like finding scattered pieces of a puzzle that keep growing more beautiful with each piece placed.

TR update: beginning with the proof of concept

I am working with Amol on three deliverables:

• proof of concept
• artistic concept
• game metrics

The proof of concept is to be a 60-second video /animation. It will consist of a comic sequence of a scenario I took out of chapter 4 of the script. There will be a storyline branching, where the player makes a decision, choosing one of three outcomes in the story. Lastly, there will be a game map showing what four of the mini-games look like.

It is a delight to work with Amol. His way of explaining his work process is very clear and easy for me to understand. Cannot wait to see the rough storyboard.

It will be the first time I will see the story I have been carrying around in my head for 25 years. Even if it is only a short sequence, it will free the characters from their long confinement.

I've written the text for an "artistic concept" document. This will be a document that is part visuals and part text. The concept explains the Talkshow Rivals’ world, the characters, the story, and the gameplay. Charlotte and Sara have kindly edited the text. It is in good enough shape to be a working version. I'll wait until I can see the sketches of the graphics before I do a last edit.

Waiting for Christmas to come

My family still sleeps 
Church steeples covered in fog 
A hot cup of tea. 

I am… not a retiree

I tried it on for a while… and after the initial euphoria, I decided it wasn’t a comfortable fit. Instead, I've decided to say, “I am a content developer and ghostwriter”, or even shorter, “I am a freelancer”. Basta.

I like working. I like my work. I like working with people. This has always been the case, and I do not see the sense in changing this now that everything is getting exciting.

Darn, my bias

A young family with three young boys. The father and the boys all have shaven heads but for short mats of hair on top. The middle boy is starting elementary school today... His school bag has a combat camouflage pattern...

Darn, if my thoughts don't wander over to AfD and neo-Nazi.

To my dear friend in need

In the cathedral
Or along a forest path

My thoughts are with you. 

The power of friendship

Years and years ago, I had a dream that haunted me for a long time. In the dream, I was standing before a tribunal, having to prove my mental competency. I stood there shaking with an ominous feeling that I was failing to prove I could care for myself.

The judges said I was to show them my bank book. (Yes, there were bank books then.) So, I handed over my bank book, and when one of the judges opened the book, instead of columns of deposited money, there was a list of names—my friends.

I remember their looks of disbelief. Even though I knew I had failed in their eyes, seeing the list of friends made me happy.

Listening to this wonderful interview above. The dream whooshed back into my thoughts. 

So, for all of you, my dear friends, I thank you so dearly for giving me so much joy and happiness and things money can't buy. To a long life!

#artists I have known: Grandma Buckley

Grandma Buckley belonged to a generation of women who mastered handicrafts at an extraordinary level. Knitting, crocheting, rug-making—these were just the beginning. In her childhood, nothing was store-bought if it could be made by industrious hands. Girls were taught from a young age to avoid the shame of "idle hands, idle thoughts." Beyond practicality, there were specific handicrafts every young lady learned to prepare a proper dowry.

Grandma’s talents went far beyond the expected. She painted delicate porcelain, crafted intricate bobbin lace, embroidered detailed flowers and landscapes, quilted, and hemstitched napkins and tablecloths. Her home was a gallery of her handiwork, her cupboards brimming with treasures. Despite only completing a grade-six education, she carried herself with the grace and refinement of a true gentlewoman.

She was also a woman of profound faith. Grandma attended mass daily, sometimes more often on special holidays. Her faith was intertwined with her creativity—she was always crafting mittens, Christmas wreaths, quilts, jams, jellies, and baked goods to sell at church bazaars. At her funeral, an old friend shared a remarkable story: Grandma’s handmade goods were so admired at these events that they outshone all others. Initially, each woman had her own table or designated spot, but buyers flocked to Grandma’s wares, clearing her table within the first thirty minutes. To avoid embarrassment for the other contributors, the organizers eventually began spreading Grandma’s creations among the other displays, ensuring fairness in the sales.

What has always puzzled me is why Grandma’s artistry was never truly acknowledged, even within our family. She never sought praise and rarely received it. Was it because she was a woman, living in a time when only men were considered artists? Or was it because traditional handicrafts were dismissed as mere domestic labor rather than actual art?

Later in life, Peter became a remarkable writer and even rediscovered his love for playing Bach on the piano. Grandma’s creative spirit skipped over Pat and John but found it in Karen, Kim, D., and me. Without fanfare or formal lessons, she inspired us simply by living her art. Her gentle persistence as a role model shaped our lives in ways she likely never imagined.

Grandma Buckley may not have been celebrated as an artist in her time, but her legacy of creativity lives on in all of us who were touched by her life and work. 

Class reunion

Such smiling faces.
Introductions are stories
Bridging 50 years.

TR update: I am really excited

After much consideration and numerous delays, I am moving forward with selling my Talkshow Rivals (TR) script. I'm giving myself a year.

Here's what has happened in the last months:

• I finished reworking the script (now version 5)
• Research on the gaming industry as a whole
• Wrote an executive summary
• Approach first game developers (fein games in Berlin)
  
  

I also have a great team of people from various corners of the world helping me:

• Charlotte (Heidelberg) has kindly offered to help me with the pitch and all communication
• Nicola (Samui, Thailand) is helping me with strategy
• Iliana (Copenhagen) is reading the script and giving feedback
• Sarah (Lübeck) is helping me understand the gaming industry better and what players like and do not like about current games on the market

#artists I have known: Uncle Peter

When we think of artists, we often picture painters, musicians, actors, or dancers. Rarely do we consider journalists. But Peter was an artist in every sense of the word—a wordsmith and a storyteller of truth.

He belonged to the Old School of Journalism, a generation of writers/journalists who believed what they did was for the betterment of society. In speech, as on paper, his deep intellect and insatiable curiosity found expression in their barest form. He made each word and each sentence count. He avoided unnecessary flourishes, letting the power of simplicity do the heavy lifting.

I was too young to read his articles when they were first published, but his legacy spoke for itself. Younger journalists who had worked with him at the Canadian Press spoke of him with reverence. They credited Peter with setting the gold standard for journalism—a benchmark that influenced not only his peers but also the generations that followed.

On a personal level, Peter was one of the few adults who encouraged my budding love for writing. At first, I was hesitant to tell him about my passion, especially for poetry. I assumed he might scoff at my efforts as the indulgences of a teenager. How wrong I was. Not only did he take my interest seriously, but he also welcomed me into his world of creative thought. Our conversations about writing were inspiring, and I was flattered that someone of his stature would take my ideas seriously.

Peter believed deeply in the transformative power of words. He understood that language can bridge gaps, ignite passions, or offer solace in times of sorrow. He taught me that a well-chosen word could change a person’s perspective. And he didn’t draw lines between the “big” world of global events and the smaller, intimate worlds we live in. To him, both were equally deserving of attention, honesty, and care.

Looking back, I realize how profoundly Peter influenced me. He showed me that writing isn’t just an act of expression; it’s an act of connection. He believed in the power of the written word to make the world a better place.

#booksIlove: Never Cry Wolf

Title: Never Cry Wolf, by Farley Mowat
When did I first read the book: sometime in the early 1970s

If you want to read a book that is, at its core, a funny antidote about how bad society is at understanding the nature of animals, this is the book for you. This book was written 60 years ago. It is a perfect case study of one of the root causes of why we, humans, continue to perpetrate mass extension in animalkind. And that is willful ignorance.  

I am... a retiree

Officially, I've been a retiree since last year. Since then, I have received my modest monthly government pension. Since June this year, I have retired from my company. Yet. I still "work" as a project manager, coach, and agile facilitator. Sometimes, I earn money. Sometimes I do the work out of the goodness of my heart. So, if being a retiree doesn't mean retiring from work, what does it mean?

At the moment, it means I no longer contribute to the state retirement plan. It also means facing the stark reality of how little my monthly pension is and how Giui and I must reduce monthly costs. And even though my monthly income has been drastically reduced, I still have to pay taxes, which supports the popular saying that the only two certainties in life are death and taxes.

I'll stop moaning about money and look at the positive aspects:

I no longer have to apply for vacation time; instead, I can just travel whenever I want.

I am the boss of my calendar. Recently, I did some contractual work for my old team and instantly found myself back in the labyrinth of meeting conflicts. 

I can focus on my main priority, which is to live healthily. This means getting 7- 8 hours of sleep a night, walking 10,000 steps a day, eating well, not drinking alcohol or eating sweets, doing yoga twice a week, and going to the gym twice a week. I used to do more sports, such as Tai Chi and meditation, but I have not done so since the children came. So, changing my focus towards more movement and a healthy lifestyle is a significant shift. 

I've been spending time travelling. Admittedly, I have been like a child in a candy shop in the last few months. I have spent a fair portion of the time travelling alone or visiting family and friends. I've travelled down to Frankfurt slowly, with regional trains. Slow travel, how luxurious is that.

Now, for the stuff I have not been doing well. Whether this is because I have yet to make the mental shift, or because I am avoiding change, I cannot say:

• spend more time with Giui 
• spend more time with the kids
• editing and selling the Talkshow Rivals script
• meditating daily 
• taking time to do "nothing" 
• drawing and painting 
• writing more 
• taking classes online 
• writing and creating a layout for my haiku book 

The list is long, but it is better to stop here. As you can see, I have a lot to reflect on and change.